Break the Chain

 Mindfulness, Opinions  4 Responses »
Jan 252012
 

The alarm clock sounds and you, puffy-eyed and mildly shocked, roll over to slap the snooze button in a desperate but futile attempt to make the room quiet once again. Rolling back to your warm spot in the bed, you snuggle back under the down comforter and begin to adjust to the shock and chill of the morning. Your eyelids are batting much wider than normal as your eyes try to adjust to the blurry view. After a few calming moments, the inevitable sound of the second alarm stirs you into action and reality kicks in. Turning your alarm off, you now begrudgingly push the covers to one side and sleepily stumble towards the bathroom, slightly chilled and now rubbing your eyes as you let out a really loud and wide yawn. Your day has begun….

With the dawn of your day, most don’t really appreciate the fact that they woken up on this side of the dirt or outside of the urn. We just begin our normal routine. It’s at this moment we need to become mindfully aware. Aware of what you say? Aware that you have to be at work in an hour or that the kids have overslept and will miss their school bus? No…mindfully aware of the gift you have been given….this thing we call life with the power to make choices based on awareness. There are many people on this fine morning that didn’t get to hit the floor running with a chance to make life better for those around them or for themselves. Your awareness is key to living a life that is worth every moment that you have been given on this planet. Becoming mindfully aware of everything takes a lot of time and I, for one, am no where close to mastering this feat. I’m just making it a point to increase my efforts and thus increase the amount of awareness that I have each day. You know, I’m really tired of being angered by the idiots that are driving in front of me or that make stupid decisions as they commute to work. I’m also tired of spurting out some obscenities to them as well. Are they suffering or is it me? I will tell you that indeed it is me. It’s my heart rate that increases and my anger that burns. What I should be is appreciative of these idiots for giving me opportunities to develop more patience or maybe there really are guardian angels and they’re using these idiots to keep me from a pending accident. Whatever it is, whatever causes you to lose focus or awareness, one should use this opportunity to refocus on this thing called life. I think the best advice I’ve ever read on maintaining a mindful awareness would be from a Thai man named Ajahn Chah. He lived in the forests of Thailand and taught around the campfire. On one of these nights, he passed along the following advice to his students. It sums up what mindfulness is all about to me.

Watch your thoughts, for they become words.
Watch your words, for they become actions.
Watch your actions, for they become habits.
Watch your habits, for they become character.
Watch your character, for it becomes your destiny

- Ajahn Chah

If we look at these five simple sentences and read them over a few times…the wisdom of an old man really shines through for all of us to ponder. What if we just slowed down our lives enough to ponder our thoughts before they become words. This awareness gives us the power to break the chain of the events that cause suffering in our lives. How many times have you said something that you’d love to take back? Being aware of your thoughts before you make them words can reduce a whole lot of suffering in your life. Stopping negative thoughts before they become words and thus actions will prevent us from developing habits and destroying our character. When you do that, you’re building a character that will become your destiny. Think about it, what if all of us were mindfully aware or at least tried to increase those qualities in ourselves. Maybe on the day we falter, someone else will not and thus will give us opportunity to stop the habit nature of our lives. Then we can become mindful of all that we do.

What then? When mindfulness takes over our lives, we make good solid decisions in our lives. We then become the peace we hope to see in this world. We then become truly, mindfully aware. We might really look at the damage we’re causing by our actions. It might be supporting an organization that we don’t really agree with or buying from a store that really doesn’t support our ideals. Maybe we’re eating poorly out of convenience rather than making a healthier lunch or eating responsibly? If we buy out of convenience rather than mindfulness, you’ll see a reduction in those little stores we adore in our hometowns and then the larger corporations taking control of our little towns. Without mindfulness, we become slaves to our actions and those around us rather than being the change we’d like to see in the world. I challenge each of you to take a few moments and become mindfully aware of your thoughts and try to stop the negative ones before they become actions. Be thankful for those around you that cause you angst because they help cultivate patience. Maybe we can truly be aware of those you love and listen like never before. Just imagine what a wonderful place this could be if we were all just a little bit more mindful in our daily lives.

I hope I’ve given you some food for thought today. Now that you know more about mindfulness, you know it is a choice. Now you’ll understand me more, each time I say, “MAKE it a great day”.

Be well and love one another.

Republican News Agency

 Opinions  2 Responses »
Aug 202010
 

The Republican News Agency,
also known as “FOX”, recently used some big words, “Carbon Footprint”. They did so in an article about Obama’s recent campaign swing through a few states. I’m sure the thought never crossed their minds to say this when Bush did the same thing. The propaganda that “News” agency puts out is absolutely blinding to those that can see and have a brain. During the last Presidential election, if you were watching FOX, you’d swear the Republicans were going to win the White House in the final hours. The amount of disinformation that comes across their wires is mind boggling. Their news organization is nothing more than a huge political front and has nothing to do with real news. They only live to enrage the masses and point them toward the cliff so all the little Republican Lemmings can jump and “be free”.

In my opinion, FOX News trademark phrase, “Fair and Balanced” should be replaced with “Fascist and Unyielding”

End of rant

Coffee House

 Opinions, People  2 Responses »
Aug 132010
 
"Hands" by ©James K Durden Photography

Today, I’m writing you from Atlanta, GA. I’ve been in Atlanta taking care of a good friend and her toddler. My friend is recovering from ACL surgery. She’s been on the couch for a day or so and can’t really move around without much pain. Thus I’m taking care of her and her toddler. It’s been a lot of work for a divorced-guy, who has no children, but I’m certainly happy to do it. This morning another friend relieved me from my duties thus I was afforded an opportunity to escape to the local “Drip” coffee house. If you’re ever in Glenwood Park you should look it up. This coffee house has been my little safe haven on this trip. A place where I can escape for just a bit and be around a diverse group of people.

Speaking of diversity, I’m looking around the coffee house and I could be in just about any coffee house in the country. The clientele include a student, who is apparently researching for his Fantasy Football picks instead of studying or reviewing his big engineering book. There is a very attractive woman who is dressed in the famed “little black dress”. She looks like a “Road Warrior” with a background in sales but is actually the most attractive law professor that I’ve ever seen. She’s been very pleasant and inquisitive. Next to the professor is a group of three jovial people, two of which have their hair in braids and tied in the back. They could just as easily fit in on a beach in Jamaica as sitting in this coffee house. I’ll call them the Happy Rasta group. The Happy Rasta group is probably the most open of all here today. I think I could chat with them all day, if only I had the time. They were quick to ask questions and answer them as well. I’m not saying the others have been closed up, not in the least. We’ve all spoken. I believe I’m the new face in the crowd and they are as eager to learn more about me as I am to meet them. We sit back and chat a little bit about different topics from the weather, career to sports. Here in the suburb of one of the largest cities in America, we sit enjoying our diversity and appreciating each other if only silently. We may disagree on politics, religion and the environment but today, we’re all just enjoying the eclectic atmosphere here in this little coffee house. I love coffee houses. However, It’s time for me to leave this little piece of heaven and return to my duties at the house.

Back at my friends house, I sit down in a big comfy leather chair. I’m talking to my friend and the TV is on in the background. The lead article during this show is how one very well known talk show host inappropriately used the “N” word in a philosophical discussion. I didn’t see or hear her talk show yesterday but apparently she angered quite a few people. She’s been “lit-up” with complaints and even made a public apology for her behavior in her next show. I’m sure the next thing I’ll see is a program that is set to divide people rather than give them a reason to come together. I don’t like shows that have no purpose but to inflate anger and hatred toward others. Why can’t we have a show that gives us well thought out discussions and goes even further on by demonstrating just how much we can accomplish by listening to each other and working together rather than yelling at one another. I think about the stress the TV is adding to this living room and thus this home. Then I compare and contrast that to the coffee house? I miss the Coffee House.

In the coffee house, we had diversity living and talking in harmony. While I’m sure we would disagree on many topics, we’re not engaging in them to create a hostile environment. Seeing this makes me only want to turn on the travel channel and learn more about foreign cultures and navigate away from any of the major networks. I’m really starting to hate mainstream media. Yes, I used the word hate. I’m a Buddhist and I dislike that word immensely. I guess if it weren’t for the extremes, we would have a hard time finding the middle. The middle is where I prefer to reside.

When you’re out and about today, stop in and have a cup of coffee or tea at your local coffee house. Engage a stranger in some dialogue and embrace that person in your mind. Be truly thankful for them because you could be home feeling your blood pressure rise as you become angry watching a stupid little box.

Well those are my thoughts this time around. I’ll try to post a little more often. However, I prefer quality over quantity. I hope you approve.

Until next time, be well and love one another. If you can’t do that then at least show no harm to one another.

In Peace,

JD
Atlanta, GA
Aug 2010

Reaching Out

 Opinions, People  1 Response »
Mar 052010
 

Just yesterday, I was driving with a friend.  We were headed to downtown Memphis to enjoy a day of shooting pictures when my low fuel light illuminated.  We pulled into this nearby gas station to get some gas.  As I was filling the tank, a young man approached from my right.  At first, I looked at him as a threat.  He was rather dirty, walking with determination as if he had a goal or target in mind.  It was one of those sunny days where the temperature was perfect in the sun and just a little cool in the shade.  Because the weather was so nice,  his long coat looked out of place to me.  I wasn’t sure if he was hiding a weapon underneath but in this particular neighborhood, it wouldn’t have been out of place.  To my surprise, his focus was on a trash can.  He leaned over without a hint of reservation and just began digging inside looking for something.  He was shoulder deep in the trash can when he grabbed his prize, a small piece of an uneaten sandwich that was loosely wrapped in its wrapper.  He quickly unwrapped the sandwich and began to consume it right over the trash can.  Once he was done with his sandwich, he looked into the can again to see if anything else could be scavenged.  Soon this young man moved to another trash can and began to do the same thing.  Surprisingly, he found another piece of a sandwich and began eating it as well.  In the span of just a few minutes, my feelings for this man had gone concern as he approached because he looked like a potential safety threat, to curiosity as he began to dig and compassion for his condition when I saw what he was doing.  He didn’t ask for a thing from anyone.  He wasn’t looking for a hand out.  He was hungry and on a mission to find food.  After I finished paying for my fuel, I pulled some money out of my wallet and approached the man.  Smiling, I extended my hand and said, “Here, take this.  Go get yourself something to eat.”  He looked at me with probably the same concern I had for him as he approached.  He took the cash and nodded without saying a word.  He turned and immediately walked into the restaurant that was inside the gas station.

In these few brief moments our path crossed, he taught me many things about myself.  Looking back on my life, I think I’ve been a little too self absorbed.  I think its only human nature but every now and then we get the blessings of these moments to redirect and focus our lives in a way that will benefit all and not just ourselves.

Truly, I think we often forget just how good we each have it in this life.  The fact you’re reading this blog means it is likely you’re not living in an alley or eating out of a trash can.  This means you’ve been blessed with many gifts, friendships and have made good decisions along your path. Life may be tough in this economy.  You may be out of work, under a pile of debt or simply looking at taking on an extra job to pay for your kids education.  No matter how tough you think you have it these days, you can look around and find someone else who has many more challenges than you have.  You’ll see that you’ve been blessed with friends and a support network that not everyone has.  I challenge each of you to look out in your world, your neighborhood, try to find those in need.  You won’t have to look far, you’ll find people right in your own neighborhood that could use a little help.  Maybe its your elderly neighbor who has trouble taking out her trash cans or a busy young couple who never seem to have enough time to shovel their own drive way after it snows.  Perhaps its a friend whose child has cancer or a relative who is fighting to keep their marriage together.  Whatever is around you, I can assure you that these people will benefit from the gift of your time, effort and simple conversation.  Look around and do something a little extra for these people you notice in your life.  You’ll be rewarded with a smile that you put on their face and the warmth that you stir within your own heart.

“Be the change you want to see in the world”

- Mahatma Gandhi